January 16, 2005

Change is in the air

2005 has already brought great change for me. I accepted an exciting new job, and changed my life overnight. I left my old job, where I had been for four years, at 6pm, and at 4:30am the next morning I got up to catch a plane to CES to start working in my new role.

My new job has brought a new (and much longer) commute, new people, new places, new routines, new challenges. I haven't been on the job two weeks yet, and I definitely am still searching for a new rhythm. I'm still getting used to the fact that people in San Francisco look and act differently than people in the South Bay. I notice the color black in clothing more. People walk everywhere. It's amazing to see people everywhere you go in the city. In the South Bay, people move from their home to their destination in cars, sheltered from everything around them by wheeled metal cages. San Francisco has an energy about it, both good and bad. It's amazing to see so many diverse people out and about, but it's sad to see so many people in less fortunate situations living on the same streets so many traverse.

Change is a powerful thing. From the mundane like the color of clothes, to the more important changes like how I approach my life. My wife today asked me how I was going to help change things with my kids. I'm starting to realize that they are changing, that they no longer need as much in the physical sense, but that their need is now deeper, more challenging to fulfill. It is hard to capture in words where they are, but I can say that my desire to share has increased. I want to share the "how" of the universe with them, at least as much of it as I know. How to program, why people do what they do, how to solve hard math problems, answer why math is actually fun. I've always looked forward to sharing so many things, but I think my kids are getting old enough to understand the bigger picture items I can relate. I just hope they still want to listen, and that they'll listen to me as they turn into teenagers...

I've also had the sense over the last couple of days that some unfortunate turn in coming. Maybe it is a sense of having a good thing and being worried that it will end. Great family, great job, good health, blessed with amazing friends who are also doing well. Rarely does life offer all things in good order. I hope it doesn't end, and I don't know why or what is coming, but I guess change always comes. My wife tends to poo-poo my premonition, says karma doesn't work that way. Here's to her being right...

Post a Comment